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...resulting in my new go-to meal: bibimbap (비빔밥). Again, meat, starch, and veggie w/ multiple colors represented. There is a pretty good Korean restaurant up the street from my apartment where the owner makes most of the food herself...kinda close to homemade! Being a creature of habit, I order the same thing every time I go. So after craving a hearty go-to meal all day today, I walk into the restaurant, get bold, and announce that I don't need a menu. "I already know what I want." I was directed towards my table and confidently tell the waitress that "I'd like the beef bibimbap." That's it. No other questions asked. She wrote it down, and I felt a sense of accomplishment as she walked away to put in my order.
I munched on my banchan (반찬 - defined in a previous post) and waited patiently to hear that familiar sizzling sound from behind me announcing that my hot, delicious meat, starch, and veggie had arrived. I was hungry and had a craving...so while I waited, I could see it and all but taste it already.
Well, I didn't hear any sizzling. Then, the waitress startled my thoughts when she came over with a big, white, COLD bowl of...bibimbap. I felt disappointed and stupid. She gave me exactly what I ordered, so what could I say? I had ordered the wrong thing. See, the thing I love most about bibimbap is that it can come in a piping hot stone pot...hence the anticipated sizzle. The rice gets crunchier and crunchier up against that hot stone as you progress through the meal. That is DOLSOT (돌솥 - stone pot) bibimbap. THAT is not what I ordered. I cockily ordered straight-up bibimbap. I was disappointed. While it was still good, I didn't get that sizzle nor the crunch. I overlooked it. My basics. I now know better. That's what I get for slacking off on my Korean lessons and sauntering up into the restaurant thinking I know WAY more Korean than I actually do. Time to hit the books again!
To those of you that fell for yesterday’s joke, I sincerely apologize. I didn’t think anyone would fall for it. Honestly, do I really seem like the type of person who could do something bad enough to get banned from all of South Korea? Either way, if it helps, I got yelled at quite a bit from close friends in and out of the country who fell for it as well.
Now that the time to prank has passed, here’s the real comic of the week. No pranks in this one, I swear.
When it comes to doctoring photos, Korea seems to do it on another level. After having my picture taken for reasons, I’ve had my chin shaved down, my eyes reshaped, and even my neck slimmed down. I get that the goal of these photo companies is to make me look good for potential job purposes, but I’m not sure if it counts if I don’t look like myself anymore.
This seems to be even worse for my friends who have non-Korean features. They tend to lose their freckles and even have their skin lightened to where they look like they belong to a different nationality. It’s kind of hilarious, yet sad in its own way.
That being said, I wouldn’t mind having some of my neck fat trimmed down that easily in real life.
Got any questions, comments, or maybe even some delicious cookies you want to send through the internet? Feel free to contact us at dearkoreacomic at gmail dot com.
You can also leave comments on the comic’s Facebook Page!
One of the coolest things that I have seen in a long time happened when I was driving to my new job at Busan University of Foreign Studies. As I was driving along I saw a colossal Buddha statue on the horizon. It was huge! As I drove along I realized that this was infact a temple of some sort and was worth investigating.
As the blossoms have bloomed in the area and the weather is warming up, I thought that it was time to check out this mysterious gigantic Buddha statue. The temple is a newer temple meaning that it is not like Beomosa, further down the road or anything. Hongbubsa is a beautifully landscaped temple with a huge golden Buddha on top. The best part about this temple is that you can go right up to it and actually get inside of it.
As Buddha’s birthday comes upon us soon, the temple has already started decorating for the celebration. This is for sure on my list for place to shoot during that time. It is unusual to see such a large Buddha statue in Korea as this is something that you’d typically see in some place like Thailand. At any rate, I can’t wait to get back out there during the blue hour when the lanterns are all lit up.
If you would like to join me on this photo outing, drop a comment below and I will put together a photowalk once I get more details and numbers. Hongbubsa is located just off the #7 HWY on your way into Busan from Yongsan. It is just before Beomosa and well if you miss it you are probably blind or in the complete wrong area.
Have you received or pulled a prank today? April 1st is April Fool’s Day, 만우절 in Korean. My husband woke up very early this morning, and I thought that he was planning to play a trick on me, but he was just watching the news. Perhaps, he got tired of playing tricks, because we have been pranking each other every 만우절 since we got married. I was tempted to turn off the water heater while he was taking a shower, but I remembered he has a cold. He’s taking a nap right now and I’m thinking of drawing a mustache on his face. A friend is coming later. When she sees him, I bet the reaction will be gut-busting! =)
I am reposting an article I wrote about April Fool’s Day in Korea. Enjoy reading and good luck on the pranks! ^^
From Korea with Love
by Das Messer
I’d been lucky enough, before expat life, to have never have suffered a true hangover. Many Sundays of my adult life had been spent sympathizing with my groaning brethren, serving them bacon and eggs and scouring medicine cabinets in an attempt to replenish their collective loss of electrolytes, while they sneered enviously at my sprightliness. After moving to Korea, however, I watched helplessly as my golden youth slipped through my fingers and the once elusive hangover became more than a vicarious pain. What follows is an account of both my very first real hangover, and the most tragic one thereafter.
The Beginning of the End
The morning after. There are a few peaceful moments before I register what I did the previous night at the bar, but as the kettle hisses away, the brain-piercing begins and haunting angst descends. Slight recollections trigger thrashing shame. I only have vague memories of binding the wrists and duct-taping the mouth of my superego, watching her helpless gaze disappear under a wave of Jameson as I proceeded to flirt shamelessly and pound at the tables of men who disagreed with me. Reams of internal rhetoric corrode my already chaffed ego, salting my tender and scored person-hood with crystallized guilt. No amount of head-hanging or face-gripping alleviates the nausea pulsing through me. In the few minutes I’ve been standing and present, my mind has upended itself. I begin to weep. It was just a drunken night, you were obnoxious, nobody really cares. Stop thinking about it, just drink the coffee.
I sit down and pick up an essay to read, in the naive hope of steadying myself against retrospective vertigo. There is an appropriate time to read David Foster Wallace, but a Sunday morning in the throes of a significant hangover (let alone your first) is not it. It’s too much. All mental energy is feeding physical recovery, my emotional firewalls have been obliterated and this literature asks too much of me now. Perhaps the news will reunite me with my humanity— another fatal error. Whatever daily defenses I have against the anguish of reality don’t exist today, somehow my sense of empathy is off the charts and I begin to panic whilst I read about the most recent gang-rapes and incomprehensible war crimes, famine, poverty, genocide – the general demise of the entire world, whose apocalyptic nature seems to inflate in proportion to personal fragility.
Shame morphs into severe white guilt, later mutating into concentrated self-loathing for being a participant in the human race. Eventually I resign with bitter disgust, and conclude that peace will reign only when humans perish altogether. I’ve been awake now for less than two hours, and I’ve successfully managed to ensure that any enjoyment I may have gleaned from a hot shower and a panini will now be tainted by the notion that there are people being burnt alive at this very moment, and worse, that I spend my life oblivious to it until I’m reeling from over-indulgence.
This was my first, and certainly not my last, real hangover. I’ve come to learn from hundreds more like this one, that lucidity of the human absurdity and transparent self-loathing peak the morning after a heavy night. We invite bleary eyed debauchery and then we weep from clarity. I have wished through every one of them that I could be gifted with a simple headache or biliousness instead of incessant mental paper-cuts, but all to no avail…until the most devastating morning of my adult life.
The End of the Beginning
A severe calf-cramp viciously yanks me from dead-weight REM. Opening my eyes seems to invite an entire world of agony directly into my soul. I moan aloud, and the sound of my own voice is terrifying. Everything is viscerally loud–I can’t differentiate between sound and pain– but I’m fairly certain that there’s a spoon scraping away rust on the inside of my skull. Ugh, four pm. Dear god! Why is this happening? Drink water. NO. Don’t drink anything – ever again. Ugh, fuuuuck! Don’t move. If you don’t move it’ll go away. If you don’t breathe the nausea will forget you. Revolt against your body. You are in control. I remain still but it won’t last long, there’s some sort of centrifugal bond between the contents of my gut and the toilet. Throwing up is weak, don’t even think about it. My eyelids flog away ceaselessly, slaving away in the name of moist equilibrium. Why can’t I see? This isn’t right. Am I dying? Jesus. I might be dying. I beg for sleep. Groan, writhe, beg, and sweat.
I am atrophied. Strength and will are hemorrhaging at an urgent rate. My heart rate feels like the white noise of every Nine Inch Nails song. I know for a fact that this is not a natural temperature for a human being to reach, yet I continue to shiver in a puddle of whiskey sweat. At an atomic level I am consumed with absolute, genuine terror at the very real prospect of my looming death. I’ve done it, I’ve poisoned myself. I’ve gone and fuckin’ killed myself – accidental suicide. Why do I do this? Argghh. No thinking.
Nature resumes control and in a motion that is completely foreign to me I’m ejected onto the bathroom floor to disgorge the most vile and luminescent poison. Terror has now reached a nuclear level. That color is not found in nature. This is toxic. Did I swallow napalm? Is this what it looks like when you melt your liver and then vomit it? I have absolutely no control over the violence gripping my abdomen. My body owns me now, and she is taking the wheel with fury and vengeance. I am condemned from this moment forth; I am nothing but subject to the laws of physics.
My head hangs awkwardly close to the recent evacuation in the toilet, tears dribble down my cheeks and into the globules of bile, warping them to form the face of god himself. In a sobbing fit I realize that prayer is all that will save me now. Please, Jesus, please – I’m so sorry. I realize now, but I don’t want to be an addict. I don’t want to turn into my father. I can’t die like this. I couldn’t bear the humiliation of diabetes at 24. I refuse to do this to my parents. Please, lord, pleeeaaase just put me in a coma for a few days and I will be better, I swear.
Even in the privacy of my own home, I am stripped bare and bitterly humiliated at how grossly weak I am. The related etymology of the words humility and humiliation makes sense to me now. The hangover is a force of nature, compelling us to face our fickle reality and brittle flesh. It rips us of the hubris that we are anything more than hopelessly decaying organic matter.
I recount the story for my friends a week later, sincere and humbled. I explain that I found god in neon pools of puke, and that my once-off devastation (because it is impossible to feel that way more than once without actually dying) led me to decide not to be an alcoholic. “I’ve never, ever felt worse in my entire life. I mean, I even pleaded with the lord!” Ralph looks at me, incredulous: “Really? That was the first time you’ve prayed a hangover away?”
Well, this is awkward. Due to some drama that went down a few months back, it looks like I am officially no longer welcome in this country. Due to legal reasons, I can’t say exactly why I have to leave. Let’s just say that one shouldn’t mix soju with plastic surgery, especially in the presence of CCTV.
Honestly, I’m pretty upset about this. I guess it’s my own fault for letting my bad judgement get the best of me. One moment, I’m planning out my fourth year in Korea, the next, I get a badly written letter from the government telling me that I need to leave.
If you’re curious, here’s a screenshot of said letter. Stupid, right?
Anyways, it’s been fun. Thank you for sticking with me for this long. You guys are the best.
Thanks so much to Alison and Kenny from A & K Wanderlusts for nominating our blog for the Liebster Award! This has been a great opportunity to get to know other bloggers in the community, and it was really fun answering the questions you gave us! At the end of this post we’ll be tagging some of YOU and give you all new questions to answer. Let’s get started!
Let’s get to the Questions!
1. If you could travel back in time to one particular moment, what would it be?
E: I’d like to see the asteroid responsible for slamming into the Earth and eventually creating the moon.
R: MLK Jr’s famous speech on the steps of the Abe Lincoln memorial.
2. If you had to fast forward to a point in your future for 10 minutes, what would it be?
E: I’d like to see the last ten minutes of my life.
R: Probably the birth of my first child! Can’t wait.
3. You find $1,000 lying on the street. What’s the first thing you would do?
E: Look around.
R: If it was that much, I’d look around and try to find the owner.
4. Beach or mountains? (And you can’t say a mountain overlooking a beach, which is my go-to answer for this one).
R: Definitely mountains!
5. What is one trait that you are constantly improving upon?
E: Being more social.
R: Talking less, listening more.
6. What food could you simply not live without?
E: Burritos. Or, more specifically, refried beans.
R: There’s honestly nothing I love THAT much, because I like pretty much everything. But if I had to choose–bread.
7. What is your most embarrassing moment? (Well, the most embarrassing moment you’re willing to share).
E: The first time I tried to kiss my wife, I missed.
R: Most recently, I was catching up with one of my best friends from high school and said something about how I’m surprised neither of us had kids yet, when she actually had a kid several years ago!! Yikes. She was gracious about it thankfully. I’ve been away for quite a while.
8. How would your best friend describe you in one sentence?
E: “I don’t know.” ..really, I asked.
R: “You’re super caring.”
9. What destination is on the top of your travel list?
E: The MOON. Here on Earth, though, I want to travel the middle east.
R: Middle East and North Africa hands down. I want Evan to experience and fall in love with Morocco the way I did.
10. When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried?
E: I saw a picture of a Sloth in a space suit.
R: An inappropriate but hilarious card played in Cards against humanity.
11. Describe your perfect day.
E: It’s Spring time and I’m in the mountains of North Carolina with my wife.
R: Going for a drive with Evan in the mountains of NC when the leaves are changing. Hanging out at our favorite coffee shop where we first met, maybe going to hear some bluegrass in the park, and eating subs from Jimmy Johns while laying in the grass.
11 Facts About Evan and Rachel
1. I used to have really long hair.
2. I was born in Germany.
3. Both my parents were in the military.
4. I have a twin brother.
5. We look nothing alike.
6. My favorite beer is Sam Adams.
7. I tend to be a mega-nerd.
8. I graduated college about 8 years after I started.
9. If my wife would let me, I’d probably only wear white shirts.
1. I’m an aquarius.
Who is up next?
Pamela from Pam in South Korea
Elisha from Epik Wandering Seoul
Elizabeth from Moving West to the East
Alex from Ninja Teacher
Meagan from Life Outside of Texas
Brian from Wandering On
Nathan from Open Road Before Me
Malachi from Living in Korea for Expats
Amanda and Derik from Living in Another Language
Kara from Kara Flaherty
Danielle from Seoul Tapper
Here are the rules!
1. Link back to the person who nominated you.
2. Answer the 11 questions given by the person who nominated you.
3. Post 11 random facts about yourself.
4. Pick 11 nominees with under 200 followers to answer your 11 questions.
5. Can’t nominate the person who nominated you!
6. Tell your 11 nominees you have nominated them.
Here are your questions!
1. Can you solve a rubix cube?
2. What is your biggest fear?
3. What accomplishment are you most proud of?
4. What is your favorite holiday and why?
5. What food do you miss the most when you’re traveling/living abroad?
6. What’s your favorite condiment?
7. Do you have a go-to joke to share with us?
8. What was your first screen name?
9. What was your first concert?
10. Have you ever flown first class?
11. Where does your name come from?/What does it mean?
Go for it!
The post All About Evan and Rachel with the Liebster Award! appeared first on Evan and Rachel.