• Avoid foreigners as much as possible, since they don't eat kimchi, and all Koreans know kimchi cures the swine flu.
• Be sure to read the 'washing hands' chart - just before you check your hair and leave the bathroom. If you do wash your hands, be sure to use as little water as possible - and never use soap. Most bathrooms don't have soap anyway.
  
• If your employer requests it, submit to a health check. Have your temperature taken by the same thermometer as everyone else in your office.
• Be sure to cover your cough. Cover your mouth with your hands, then shake the hands of your boss.
  
• Continue visiting spas and public baths, eating out of the same bowls, wearing communal slippers when in the bathroom, and double dipping at the the restaurant.
• Wear a mask that covers your nose and mouth. Be sure to wear it below your chin anytime you're eating or around other people.
• Be sure to buy all the hand sanitizers you can find. Then, put them away in a box and forget about them.
• Finally, don't worry about catching the swine flu if you've never left the country. It's a Mexican disease - Koreans can't catch it.
  

• Be sure to call your employer if you're feeling sick, but go into work if you're ordered to.
• If one of your student sneezes, coughs, or appears sick in any way, be sure to let your principal know. Then, go back to teaching. Don't try isolate or move the student in any way from giving a wet Willie or dong chim to the rest of the class - swine flu can't be transmitted in that way.
• If you cough, sneeze, or have a headache, be prepared to be taken to a hospital by a friendly Korean. We'll test you for free, and send you home for a self-quarantine until we know the results.
• Your self-quarantine is not a vacation. Be sure not to leave your apartment for any reason, no matter how you feel. If you run out of food, have it delivered to your house.
  
• If you go on vacation and come back to Korea with the swine flu, know that your school will fire you for it.
• Assume your school is completely clean, because your students clean the entire school with rags and water. Those fancy sanitizing sprays aren't needed, since they're dangerous and will only make people sick.
  

• 4th-5th - Oktoberfest (Seoul) - not sure why a festival with 'Oktober' in it's name is celebrated in September, but for 100,000 won you get a night's worth of unlimited beer and authentic food, along with celebrations, competitions, and lots of other stuff. Korea4expats is offering a 10% discount by going through them - check out this page for more details.
• 9th-15th - Jeju International Delphic Games. Different performances of music, arts, crafts, design, visual art, architecture and much more. Learn more at http://www.delphic2009.com/
• 10th - All you NFL fans, find your way to Rocky Mountain Tavern (Itaewon and Hongdae) to watch the first of many games. NHL fans, preseason starts on the 14th and the real deal starts on October 1st.
• 10th-13th - the International Body Painting Festival in Daegu. Certainly a colorful sight, and not as risque or unprofessional as you might think. It's certainly worth the trip to Daegu - Duryu Park, near Duryu station (line 2 on Daegu's subway system).If you can't make it, or aren't yet convinced, view some of the jaw-dropping artwork at http://dibf.co.kr/eng/index.html
• 11th-13th - Namhansanseong (AKA Nam mountain fortress) is holding a festival reenacting the various struggles of Koreans defending against the Chinese. It's a good excuse to get out of Seoul - and I had fun both times that I went.
• 18th-20th - The Daehangno Culture Festival - also known as the Hyehwa area, the festival sounds like a non-clubbing form of Hongdae, and will include a couple cook-off along with an 'off-beat' market of unusual items. Hyehwa station, line 4, exit to street level.
• 18th - October 7th - Bucheon Intangible Cultural Heritage Expo - not to be outdone by Incheon's festival, Bucheon (just west of Seoul) offers a variety of international performances and displays. Cheaper and a little closer to Seoul than Incheon, check out their website (in English) for plenty of info. Near Songnae station (line 1) at the Bucheon Image Culture Complex.
• 23rd-27th - Heungtaryeong Dance Festival (Cheonan) - see some of the traditional dances, songs, and costumes of Korean history. Although some distance from Seoul, Cheonan is connected to Seoul by subway or train for the rest of the country. More information in English at http://www.dancefestival.or.kr/english/1introduce/intro_1.asp
• 23rd-27th - Jeonju International Sori Festival - considered by some to be the greatest music festival in Korea. I haven't been personally, so I can't say. Promising indie, rock, and punk, the website has yet to upload it's schedule (??), but is worth checking back on once things are finalized.
• 26th-27th - Seoul Drum Festival - last year was lots of fun, and this year promises more of the same. Seoul Forest (Ttukseom station, line 2, exit 8).
• 27th - October 4th - Namsan International Folk Music Festival - a full week of crafts, fireworks, and performances from 10 countries, with international performances happening on the 2nd. Look around Namsan Park and the Hanok Village in Namsan.

Every Saturday night in September, there are also various performances happening in both Seoul Plaza (in front of City Hall; 7:30pm start time) and along the Banpo part of the Han River (see here for a map) - just follow your ears in either case. Don't forget about the baseball games across the country and the entire list of events at Korea4expats.com. 10 Magazine also does an excellent job at covering almost every event happening across the country - check them out as well.

© Chris Backe - 2009

The Korean film industry is seething after a copy of the blockbuster "Haeundae" was found being illegally distributed over the internet last weekend, especially since the film had galvanized the industry by becoming the fifth Korean film ever to draw over 10 million viewers. Public calls for strong legal action against piracy are gaining support, but it might be too late to stop the spread of the bootleg overseas as it is already circulating on Chinese websites.

"Haeundae" was leaked online to a Korean file-sharing site on Saturday morning, according to CJ Entertainment, a major investor in the movie and its distributor. It spread quickly and by Saturday evening copies were available for download on most file-sharing sites, the company said. CJ had identified 24 sites where "Haeundae" was being circulated by Saturday, while police found over 160. It is estimated that the film has already been downloaded several hundred thousands times in Korea alone.

"Pirate DVDs of 'Haeundae' will be on the market in China by Tuesday, and you'll be able to find them on the streets of Bangkok sometime this week," said an official at CJ Entertainment. "Realistically, there is little we can do to fix the situation."

Illegal trading of content over the internet is a crime subject to a maximum of five years in jail or W50 million fine (US$1=W1,249).