by Pablo Harris

You know there’s only one thing that can make me smile
Barkeep, just make my turkey wild
They got all them bird & biscuits, peas & mashed potatas in a pile
But all I need is a glass of that turkey, Wild

Baby ain’t in bed, she certainly ain’t in the kitchen
‘Cause she knows I’m a seven year itchin’
Don’t need no rocks, don’t even need a glass
Sure as hell don’t need you to preach no mass

There’s only one thing that can make me smile
Barkeep, just make my turkey wild
They got all them bird & biscuits, peas & mashed potatas in a pile
But all I need is a glass of that turkey, Wild

Perhaps I should give my babe a call
Perhaps I should take the next train to ‘Frisco
But I know we’ll end up in a brawl
Me camping in the ditch with a bottle of Cisco

Cuz there’s only one thing that can make me smile
Barkeep, make my turkey wild
They got all them bird & biscuits, peas & mashed potatas in a pile
But all I need is a glass of that turkey, Wild

Sometimes the bar eats you, sometimes you eat the bar
Sometimes you got to go all in with a cougar stalkin’ from afar
She sure ain’t pretty, more of a trick than a treat
But Lord knows, this year, I’d be thankful for a li’l white meat

There’s only one thing that’s really going to make me smile
Barkeep, please just make my turkey wild
They got all them bird & biscuits, peas & mashed potatas in a pile
But all I need is a glass of that turkey, Wild

Is it the bird flu, do I have the dreaded Yellow Fever
Am I hallucinating, perhaps it’s neither
Tho’ I feel it’s my neck whacked by the butcher’s cleaver
Maybe this madness is from a dearth of holiday reefer

Nah, there’s only one thing gonna make me smile
Barkeep, turkey, wild
They got all them bird & biscuits, peas & mashed potatas in a pile
But all I need is a glass of that turkey, Wild