Usually, the women do all the preparing of food, set it up, and clean everything up at the end while the men just sit around eating the food and drinking alcohol around one table. On another table, food and drink is presented artistically around a picture of the dead family member, or if there is no picture a possession of theirs or a note. Once everything is in place, relatives of the deceased then take turns in bowing three times at regular intervals to the table, alcohol is poured into a bowl and spoons are placed inside bowls of rice and other dishes so that the spirit can eat if they choose to.
This month I had the pleasure (or the misfortune) of experiencing a traditional death anniversary with my wife's family here in Korea. Basically what happens is this: every year on the death of a close family member the family comes together to remember them and make offerings to their spirit in the form of lots of food and drink.